I like to notice things I take for granted. Knowing which bathroom to use is usually a pretty easy task enabled by nearly universal signage. My most recent stint of having to repeatedly use public toilets was at Disney World, a place known for its designs and clever art work. But while I was headed to the loo one day I got thinking about the designers of the bathroom signs at Disney World. What was the designer thinking?
Was this just a rush job?
Did he consider his/her final product art?
Was this just for a paycheck?
Was this something he wrote home about?
What does he think of when he has to use a lavatory?
Did he get the assignment because he got in trouble?
This last thought has me intrigued. I imagine that if you draw an inappropriate cartoon they reassign you to lavatory design in whatever park you’re associated with.
There is the odd chance that there’s some designer who’s an expert at lavatory sign design in Disney World, loves his job and gets called in by senior brass for special consults.
Steve, we’re investing millions into this Star Wars immersion thing and we don’t know how to design the lavatory signs. Name your price. Help us, you’re our only hope….
Privacy in the bathroom is something our Western society often takes for granted. What’s also pretty interesting is we extend that physical privacy into our language by referring to the activities our bodies naturally go through while in the bathroom. Thankfully sites like Wiktionary have consolidated a list of terms used for urination and defecation.
I’ve adjusted the list to be numbered so in addition to reading you can see how many items are on the list.
Pull a few cones (Think Mr Whippy soft serve ice cream, and the cones)
Punching a growler
Punishing the porcelain
Punishing the toilet
Put food in the dog’s water
Releasing a depth charge
Releasing a Dungbomb
Releasing Meatloaf’s Daughter
Releasing the chocolate hostages
Releasing the hostages
Releasing the Kraken
Releasing the hounds
Reset unload two
Restocking the pond with brown trout
Ride a pony and trap
Riding the Centaur
Ring of fire
Sacrificing to the Toilet/Porcelain god
Saturday morning special
SE (Sit and Emit)
Sending a Fax
Shed some ballast
Shitting bricks (Houses or apartments as substitutes for higher quantity.)
Showering the room with roses
Slopping gruel in Oliver’s bowl
Spray-painting the porcelain
Stalling a brown sedan
Streaming Nixie (naval expression referring to an anti-submarine device towed behind a ship by a long, thick, possibly brown cable)
Studying one’s Process Design notes (refers to Environmental Engineering Process Design, a course taught to civil and environmental engineering undergraduates and that deals with, among other topics, the design of wastewater treatment facilities)